So the new Tigers motif is to go on a string of losses
and then win a game to break things up and raise a few
eyebrows.  Then it's back to the daily grind.
Somebody needs to tell these guys that it's tough to
win when you're losing after nine innings.  I just
hope that one of their rare wins come this Sunday, as
myself and a whole slew of friends and family will be
in attendance to see the Tigers take on the
Diamondbacks (check another team off my list).  Here's
a little warning to Tiger fans:  Thursday we're
throwing Matt Roney against Pedro.  Shall I cue up
Alice Cooper's "Welcome to My Nightmare?" 

New Subscribers...

A whole slew of fresh fish, courtesy of Chas "Grey
Fox" Claus.  Welcome to the list (welcome back in some
cases) and I hope (EXPECT!) to hear from you soon...

Caleb "Small Town" Griffis
Kevin "Witt" Kopek
Mike "Heath" Kopek
Lucas "Damian" Miller
John "Flaherty" Yorke
Jamie "Beast" Peters
------------------------------------------------------
Week of 6/18 - 6/24

Record:  1-6 LLWLLLL

There are three things in life that are inevitable;
death, taxes, and the growth of the undy five hundy
index.  Chalk up another five spot this week to set
the meter at 38.  To put it this way, the Tigers could
win every game on the schedule before Rick Grillo's
wedding and still have an undy five hundy of 18 games.
 Even if they had a winning streak until my birthday
they'd still be 3 games undy.  And this is the easiest
division to compete in.  I'd like things to get
better, how can they get any worse?  But I don't want
to be a stick in the mud.  We're not mathematcially
eliminated yet!

Dunn vs. the Tigers...

Adam Dunn:  22 HR's
Tigers:     18 Wins

Up Next for the Tigers...
June 25-26        @Boston
June 27-29        Arizona
June 30 - July 2  Toronto

AL Central Standings...
KCR 39 34 -
MIN 40 35 -
CWS 36 40 4.5
CLE 30 44 9.5
DET 18 56 21.5

Tigers Division...
ATL 49 25 -
SEA 49 25 -
|
MIL 30 45 19.5
TEX 28 47 21.5
TBD 25 50 24.5
SDP 25 53 26
DET 18 56 31

Ever wonder what's going to become of Tiger Stadium?
Click here to make your stomach turn. 

http://www.detnews.com/2003/tigers/0306/23/a01-199828.htm

News and Notes:  UP:  Fernando Rodney, Andres Torres,
and A.J. Hinch.  DOWN (respectively): Gary Knotts,
Ernie Young, and Brandon Inge.  It's pretty suprising
to me that Knotts is getting sent down, but oh.  Hinch
is a catcher who last was with KC, I believe.  Rodney
was with the club last year and we are all familiar
with Torres. 
------------------------------------------------------
Tiger of the Week...
------------------------------------------------------
One of the bright spots for the Tigers this last week
has been Eric Munson.  In the last seven days, Munson
is hitting .417 with 3 HR's.  Sadly, he's only scored
four times and knocked in five runs, so aside from his
home runs (scoring himself) he's only generated three
extra runs.  But when nobody else hits, your stats
suffer.  Munson is part of the young nucleus though,
and this is promising if this lineup will one day be
feared. 
------------------------------------------------------
Lima Time!!!
------------------------------------------------------
Mo Vaugh is out!  And there was much rejoicing...
Jose Lima is back!  And there was much rejoicing.
Don't look now, but Jose Lima is back pitching right
here in the AL Central for the Kansas City Royals.  So
far he's 1-0 in two starts, beating the Cardinals in
St. Louis.  Boy it's tough being a small market team.
New York needs a pitcher so they sign Mike Mussina, or
the Mets sign Tom Glavine.  KC needs a pitcher and
they tap the resource that is Jose Lima.  That's about
as reliable as Wile E. Coytoe strapping a rocket on
his back to chase the Roadrunner, it looks good in the
plans but it will in all likelyhood blow up in their
faces.  But I love the fact that Lima is back and
expecially that we'll get to see him when the Tigers
play the Royals.  Maybe now when I watch him pitch and
start chanting his name only to see him give up a
salami it will be a good thing.  LIMA TIME!
------------------------------------------------------
Poll Question...
------------------------------------------------------
The No Trade Clause...

Now I am the first guy that will lament about the lack
of loyalty in baseball, so you'd think I'd like the no
trade clauses that players get in their contracts.
But the clauses often don't say "you can't trade me at
all" but "you can only trade me here here and here."
Tuesday night, the Expos and Rangers worked out a
trade for Juan "move the fences in because I'm a
pansy" Gonzalez, but Juan is said to be exercising his
no trade clause and staying with Texas.  Now I know
that the teams agree to these things, but it seems
that a no trade clause is like free refills on pop at
restaurants.  If you want to treat your player with
repsect, you give him this clause.  Otherwise, the
player will look elsewhere.  I think it's all bush and
that the team should be able to trade you whenever
they want to.  That's life, boo hoo.  You'll just have
to make millions elsewhere.  My heart bleeds for you.

What is your opinion involving no trade clauses or
other forms of bargaining power that players are given
by their contracts?  If this question bores you, you
can still respond as to who your favorite player is,
as the general feedback on that topic was weak. 
------------------------------------------------------
Game Linescores...
------------------------------------------------------
June 18:  Cleveland 4 - Detroit 1
Starters:  CLE: Davis 9IP - DET: Bonderman 6.1IP
CLE  000 000 310  4 10 1
DET  000 000 001  1  7 1
W: Davis     (6-5)
L: Bonderman (2-10)

June 19:  Cleveland 10 - Detroit 3
Starters:  CLE: Anderson 6IP - DET: Cornejo 4.2IP
CLE  010 141 210  10 14 0
DET  000 011 010   3  8 1
W: Anderson (4-6)
L: Cornejo  (3-5)

June 20:  Detroit 7 - Colorado 5
Starters:  DET: Maroth 6IP - COL: Elarton 5IP
DET  130 002 001  7 13 1
COL  200 100 002  5 11 1
W: Maroth  (2-11)
L: Elarton (3-3)

June 21:  Detroit 6 - Colorado 9
Starters:  DET: Roney 3.2IP - COL: Jennings 7IP
DET  110 100 003  6 12 1
COL  000 231 30X  9 10 1
W: Jennings (7-5)
L: Sparks   (0-4)

June 22:  Detroit 3 - Colorado 5
Starters:  DET: Bernero 6IP - COL: Neagle 6.1IP
DET  010 000 200  3 7 1
COL  302 000 00X  5 7 0
W: Neagle  (1-2)
L: Bernero (1-10)
S: Jimenez (17)

June 23:  Detroit 1 - Boston 3
Starters:  DET: Bonderman 6IP - BOS: Wakefield 6IP
DET  000 000 001  1  6 0
BOS  000 011 01X  3 10 0
W: Wakefield (6-3)
L: Bonderman (2-11)
S: Timlin    (2)

June 24:  Detroit 1 - Boston 10
Starters:  DET: Cornejo 4IP - BOS: Lowe 8IP
DET  000 000 100   1  7 0
BOS  012 032 02X  10 17 0
W: Lowe    (8-3)
L: Cornejo (3-6)
------------------------------------------------------
Readers Write In...
------------------------------------------------------
Peter "Poetry and Prose" Ciofani

Regarding your poll question. My all-time person
favorite (I know I'm dating myself) was and still is
Rocky Colavito of the Tribe, (and a few other
teams). Rocky was the ultimate hard working outfielder
who played 100% all the time.  Pete Rose could have
learned from him. He had great power and a cannon
for an arm. He was slow but always gave 100%. I felt
like he was like a brother.  When he hit a HR it made
my day, regardless of how the Tribe did.
------------------------------------------------------
Nick "The Solon Peach" Ciofani  ***POTW***

Ty Cobb without a doubt.  Number one reason was that
he was a Tiger, ok not really, but when I was a kid,
our library had baseball histories of every team
(these were done in the early 80s) and I would always
check out the Tigers book b/c they had some great
pictures of Cobb.  In fact, my first biography I ever
read was about Ty Cobb, it took me the entire summer,
I was only 9 at the time.  Anyway, why I liked him,
because he had some of the greatest lifetime
statistics of all time.  Plus, I always felt he did
not get the respect he deserved, b/c of his racist
views.  He really didn't give a damn about anything or
anyone which only increased my respect for him.  Let's
also not forget he got more votes than Babe Ruth in
the first balloting for the hall of fame. Finally, one
of my favorite lines about him was in 1960 when he was
like 70, he was asked how he would fare against major
league pitching at his age, his reply, "bat about
.300"  Awesome.
------------------------------------------------------
Andy "Moon Unit" Karnitz

SAMMY CRANKED ONE TONIGHT W/OUT CORK!!!

all is well in mudville, if ya ask me. sam hadda jus'
been goin' 'bout slump bustin' in the wrong manner
when he brought that bad stick to the plate a couple
o' weeks back. i'm prretty much convinced of that!  he
shoulda  consulted old pal  m. grace on the proper
ways to snap out, though. if anyone who's browsin'
doen't know what i'm talkin' 'bout, please listen to
jim rome a bit more. grcey will almost assuredly be in
the booth someday(hey, he's been there in the playoffs
already), but he'd get canned if he ever told the
"jumpin' on a grenade for the boys" tale if it were up
to espn(though he might use it if fox hires him).

i'm pretty sure yer right, matt(got the name right
twice, so far, pal), that credit  fer settin' the
mendoza line goes to patchie and bochte- but i think
the number is .212. mendoza, 'cuz he had such a great
glove, kept his job after hittin' that particular
weight the precedin'
season. i might be wrong, but the spring's been so
cold that it's effecting my gray matter.

i used to appreciate mr. ciofani's cry for sympathy as
to the hardships of the northern ohio
fandom, but...... ya see, nick, this guy from
cleveland moved to grand rapids 5 years ago
and he does nothin' but rub it in when the tribe beats
the kitty's. cleveland mikey LITERALLY sticks his
chubby index finger in my face and cackles like a
muther luvvin'
hyena. so, untils i meets one of ya's with some
empathy, well, i can't even have no sympathy.

sorry fer all the apostrophes, kids, but i been
listenin' to too much zappa lately. a bit of advice
from frank, if ya ain't familiar:
"watch out where the huskies go/ and don't you eat the
yellow snow"

-andy
------------------------------------------------------
Dallas "Pooley" Senters

i understand your comment about the reds and
the "excessive" jumping.  in their defense (as they
are my favorite team) each game has a new hero.
you can't let boone have a big homeplate party
and not kearns....and so on.  once all the boys
have been in the middle of the celebration, then
they have to do something new.  it's like "our"
mile-high salute.

poll question response:  first i would like to make
fun of any TW reader who picks any player that
they have only seen on espn classic or read about
for sixth grade history.  i think that you have to
pick a player from your generation of baseball.  i,
as a red fan, have the luxury of picking a world
series
champ...barry larkin.  i have always liked barry and
he has been the man in the 6 spot for my team
for a lot of years now.  i hope the reds can make
some playoff noise for barry, before injuries
completely
take him off the field (the suckiest reason to retire)

racism in america has shifted from the kkk and a
separate negro league to minority groups claiming
prejudice to turn the tables the other way.  somewhere
there needs to be more minorities that call the
jose canseco's of the world for what they are...idiots
and jerks that whine too much.

dallas
-------------------------------------------------------
Toolie's Trashtalk...

Last week I chronicled the bullpen.  I think I'll
start off this week with a hitters analysis.  Just a
note, I am not using the same sophisticated methods
that Dave Dixon used in the beginning of the year with
his preseason predictions.  So minus regression
analysis and other statistical models, here goes...

1.  Alex Sanchez - A great pickup.  Here's a guy that
can steal some bases when he gets on.  That ability to
steal allows the hitters behind him to sit on
fastballs, which they see more of in an attempt by the
pitcher to make it harder for the runner to steal.  A
nice addition to a squad that has nothing to lose.

2.  Warren Morris - Ok, this guy has been playing well
so far.  I like his glove (at least what I've seen)
and he's at .302 and has only K'd 3 times in 53 at
bats.  Some Toolie-esque strikeout numbers. 

3.  Bobby Higginson - As poor as he's hit this season,
I still feel good when he gets up there with ducks on
the pond.  He's still the guy that I saw hit four HR's
in four official at bats.  He just needs to get it
together.  I give him credit with sticking with
Detroit.  He sure gets paid a lot for it though.

4.  Dmitri Young - A keeper, enough said.  Bat good,
glove bad.  We'll settle. 

5.  Craig Monroe - Hmmm, who to compare him to?  He
reminds me of Gabe Kapler.  Lots of potential, but not
going to pan out in the long run.  Just a feeling.

6.  Eric Munson - About time we stopped hearing about
him and started seeing him in action.  10 HR's
already.  That's not bad at all.  A couple more years
in the bigs and he could really be crushing the ball.

7.  Andres Torres - Outfielder of the future?  Torres
and Sanchez are both speedy outfielders, with Torres
having a little more pop.  Having both in the lineup
would be dangerous if they're both on their game. 

8.  Matt Walbeck - This guy can't hit.  His defense
and lack of a better option keep him on the roster.

9.  Omar Infante - This guy will be good.  He has
shown some real flare with the glove and should
develop into our shortstop for many years. 

Everyone else is marginal for now, save Santiago,
Halter, and an injured Carlos Pena.  But that's my
view of the current starting nine.  Maybe I should
have written about Hinch instead of Walbeck, but I
haven't been able to watch Hinch much at all yet.  I'm
sure he's just filling in until Inge supposedly gets
it together. 

As far as my favorite player goes, I've never had one
through all my years, strange as that may seem.  When
I was young I was big on the Tigers and the Cubs.  I
think my favorties were Leon Durham and Frank Tanana,
but only because his name rhymed with banana.  As I
got a little older, I began to dislike Frank Viola,
Kent Hrbek, Greg Gagne, and Kirby Puckett (notice a
trend?).  I had this strange fascination with Matt
Nokes (who's 1987 Topps Traded card is still in a box
in mint condition somewhere at my folks' house).
There is this guy named Mo Vaughn that I didn't like
very much.  I did start liking Billy Wagner when he
was earning his reputation as a closer.  As far as
recent Tigers are concerned, my faves have been Weaver
and Fick.  But both have moved on to greener pastures.
 I think if there was one guy that I'd really want on
my team as an all out great baseball guy it would be
Jack Morris.  What a pitcher... even if he did go and
pitch for those evil Twins. 

I never thought I'd say it, but Karl Ravech of
Baseball Tonight is really starting to get on my
nerves with his "Hats off to Jim Thome" line.  Why the
heck is it always "Hats Off" with Thome?  If it has
significance then I don't get it.  Maybe I'm missing
the boat or something, but every time Thome has the
smallest highlight it's "HATS OFF TO JIM THOME."
Geesh, Karl, give it a rest. 

Congratualtions are in order for Tigers Weekly
subscriber Ryan Throne.  By the time the next issue
comes out, Mr. Throne will be a married man.  Throne,
I'll be there to see it happen, but I think I'll get
there after JB gives you an erotic dance.  I've
already experienced one incident involving JB, an
erotic dance, and the couch on the porch of the
Highlands.  That night I learned it's possible to
laugh and gag at the same time.  Anyways, way to go
Throney.  Some advice for the honeymoon, don't try and
take her to a dis-GO. 

Give me a car and I guarantee that I'll find something
wrong with it in less than two months.  In the case of
my current ride, it took roughly twenty seconds to
find that the brakes were making funny noises.  They
had to be fixed.  Now the darned thing won't start.  I
feel like Adam Sandler here.  I think it's the curse
of the 1988 Cutlass Ciera.  Ever since I got rid of
that machine (which had been fairly reliable) I've
been on a car carousel.  I've been in an accident, hit
two deer, and have had to get new mufflers, fix my
brakes,and fiddle with fuel pumps.  I must have been
born under a bad sign...the same sign that dooms me to
follow the Tigers.  Getting rid of that Cutlass Ciera
is like my personal albatross. 

So Ciofani's first biography was on Ty Cobb, eh?  I
wish I could have been so lucky.  I remember pulling
my first biography from the shelves of the Sacred
Heart Library.  Sam Houston.  Named after the city I
think .  ;-)  Ciofani's post was good, but it was the
message he left on my answering machine referring to
dying in Vegas, being buried by casinos, and living
there eternally that put him over the edge for the
week.  Ciofani and I continue to be the greatest 1-2
punch in Hillsdale history.  Big D, I see your
argument about people who's favorite player in someone
that they never got to watch, but some guys were just
awesome and baseball is dramatically different now
than it was.  For that reason I am down with a
favorite player being from before one's time. 

That's all for another week.  It's getting powerfully
hot about now.  Balls will be jumping out of the park
in this heat.  After the All-Star break, the fun of
the season will be playing spoiler for other teams in
the American League.  The AL Central is a three team
race right now, so the Tigs need to play competitive
ball and take some pride back.  Start it off with a
win against Boston.  Regulators, mount up!

Call me Billy Bean
I'm Out

Toolie
------------------------------------------------------
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