Another week and another string of losses.
Interleague play takes a break for one series, and
then it's another series of small ball and double
switches.  Though if you take a look at the Los
Angeles series, you'd think it had been played at
Dodger Stadium.  So far the Tigers are 3-9 against the
senior circuit.  For all you non math majors out
there, that's a .250 mark.  Not bad for this squad. 
-------------------------------------------------------
Week of 6/11 - 6/17

Record:  1-5  LLLWL-L

Undy five hundy, how do I love thee?  Let me count the
ways.  I can't even imagine doing a Weekly without
this endearing feature.  How would I ever be able to
live without it?  In all seriousness, I need the Undy
Five Hundy like I need a hole in the head.  But
according to some folks I know, that wouldn't be too
correct of a comparison.  The Tigers, they blow, thus
the index must grow... to 33. 

Dunn vs. the Tigers...

Adam Dunn:  22 HR
Tigers:     17 Wins

Seventeen wins!  This is amazing.  If they can manage
to win four more games by the end of June (a tall
order, I wouldn't bet on it) then they'll be averaging
seven wins a month. 

Up Next for the Tigers...

June 18-19  Cleveland
June 20-22  @ Colorado
June 23-26  @ Boston

AL Central Standings
MIN  38 31 -
KCR  35 32 2
CWS  32 38 6.5
CLE  27 41 10.5
DET  17 50 20

Tigers Division...
SEA 47 22 -
|
TEX 27 41 19.5
CLE 27 41 19.5
TBD 24 44 22.5
SDP 23 49 25.5
DET 17 50 29

News and Notes:  Gene Kingsale, meet the 15 day DL.
Groin problem.  Yeouch.  So now there is an E. Young
on the team.  Ernie Young.  I witnessed Ernie in
person on Friday.  He strikes out with the best of
them. 
-------------------------------------------------------
Tiger of the Week...
-------------------------------------------------------
This week the award goes to the member of the team
that most resembles a tiger.  Of course, I am talking
about PAWS, the mascot.  Here's a guy who gets out
there every night and gives it his all.  He's not
getting paid a lot.  He doesn't get any of the glory
(and there's not much to go around).  And he has to be
the mascot of the worst team in professional sports.
So this week we pay tribute to PAWS...also available
for birthday parties.
------------------------------------------------------
The Lost Boys...
------------------------------------------------------
Hey, I'm looking for some old boys (and girls) that
may like to receive the Weekly.  If you have them,
please send me these people's addresses.  Thanks.

Jamie Peters
Kathy Andrews
Todd DeVree
Scott Lockhart
Jeremy Goetz
-------------------------------------------------------
Jeff Reboulet Weekly...
-------------------------------------------------------
Just kidding.  I used to have this thing against Jeff
Reboulet.  I hated his stupid little moustache, and he
always seemed to hit the Tigers well when he was with
the Royals and Orioles.  Well now he's in the NL with
the Pirates and the moustache has evolved into the
goatee.  So I can't even hate on Jeff Reboulet
anymore.  But who would really care about that anyway?
 What would I make fun of?  His claim to fame is the
late game defensive substitution.
-------------------------------------------------------
Poll Question...
-------------------------------------------------------
Who is your all time favorite baseball player, and
why? 
-------------------------------------------------------
Mendoza Line...
-------------------------------------------------------
While at the game on Friday, Weiland and I postulated
about the origin of a .200 average being referred to
as the Mendoza Line.  If things continue, a .100
average will begin to be referred to as the Walbeck
Line.  Well, Y did a little research and found that
the Mendoza line is most likely attributed to Mario
Mendoza.  His career highs were 2 HR and a .245
average.  He played nine seasons and hit undy two
hundy five times.  The term was possibly started by
teammates Tom Paciorek and Bruce Bochte.  The phrase
spread due to its use by George Brett.  As for Toolie,
well he hit a solid .333 in high school (not too grand
for a high school average), well above the Mendoza
Line.  He was also 1 for 1 lifetime at Old Kent Park.

-------------------------------------------------------
Game Linescores...
-------------------------------------------------------
June 11:  Los Angeles 3 - Detroit 1
Starters:  LAD: Brown 7IP - DET: Bernero 7.2IP
LAD  000 210 000  3  4  1
DET  001 000 000  1  6  0
W: Brown   (9-1)
L: Bernero (1-8)
S: Gagne   (23)

June 12:  Los Angeles 3 - Detroit 2
Starters:  LAD: Ishii 7IP - DET: Bonderman 7IP
LAD  020 010 000  3 10 1
DET  101 000 000  2  6 1
W: Ishii     (6-2)
L: Bonderman (2-9)
S: Gagne     (24)

June 13:  Colorado 7 - Detroit 2
Starters:  COL: Chacon 7.1IP - DET: Cornejo 5IP
COL  010 006 000  7 12 1
DET  000 110 000  2  8 1
W: Chacon  (9-3)
L: Cornejo (3-4)

Toolie Sees a Ball Game...

So I made a few phone calls and ended up with a goer
for my third game of the year.  I drove the soon to be
disabled Cutlass down to the Claus residence in
Clarkston and met up with Galloway 4th floor brother
Matt Weiland.  A short drive and we were at CoPa for
my third game of the season. 

The bleacher seats were sold out, so we sprang for
some left field 14 buck tickets.  We got seats in the
second row, which wasn't bad, but the fact that there
is another fence there now puts you a bit further back
than second row may make you think.  The worst part
about these seats was that you couldn't really see the
big screen or hear the announcer very well.
Obviously, they don't have very good sound technicians
at that place.  As it happened, I did turn around to
see the Dunkin Donuts race (a dull roar alerted me to
something exciting on the screen).  The Donut won and
I think our section was the Shake, so no discount
donuts for us.  There was some guy sitting on our left
(now on the power bomb list) who thought that everyone
around him wanted to hear his every thought.  I swear
if this guy had two brains, he'd be lonesome.  A fine
coincidence occured, in that fellow grad student Brian
Vessel was at the game, one section over and two rows
back... small world. 

About the bottom of the second, Weiland finished his
ball park dinner (two hot dogs and a pop) so I passed
off the scorecard and foraged for a feast of my own.
Ball Parks in hand,  I went back to enjoy.  We saw a
good inning of baseball in the bottom of the fifth
(yes, Mrs. B, the bags were at one point loaded).  The
Tigers took the lead off a couple of sacrifices.  For
the first time in my three games, the Tigers had
runners on second and third, prompting a graphic that
I had never seen before.  It shows ducks on 2nd and
3rd base, shaking their tailfeathers.  Of course, the
caption is "Ducks on the Pond."  It's a good one.
Well after loading the bases, Craig Monroe did his
best Tony Clark impression by pulling a big K. The
Rockies responded in the top of the sixth by plating
their first five batters, capped by Mark Sweeney's
three run bomb to right.  I was about to dub Chris
Spurling "The Turnicate" as he came in relief to
strike the next two batters out, but Juan Uribe went
yard on Spurling to the new short porch in left. 

The rest of the game was rather uneventful.  The
Tigers got the first two batters on in the eighth, but
a line out and two K's ended any hopes of a comeback.
We declined to stick around for the fireworks (which
is a great show) and drove back to the Claus Haus for
food, folks and fun. 

June 14:  Colorado 7 - Detroit 9
Starters:  COL: Elarton 5IP - DET: Maroth 5IP
COL  101 102 002  7  9 0
DET  021 013 20X  9 15 1
W: Ledezma  (2-2)
L: Elarton  (3-2)
S: Spurling (3)

June 15:  Colorado 5 - Detroit 4
Starters:  COL: Jennings 6IP - DET: Knotts 4.2IP
COL  000 050 000  5 10 0
DET  100 101 100  4 11 0
W: Jennings (6-5)
L: Knotts   (2-5)
S: Jimenez  (16)

June 16:  no game scheduled...

June 17:  Cleveland 7 - Detroit 4
Starters:  CLE: Sabathia 6IP - DET: Bernero 3.2IP
CLE  100 500 100  7 10 1
DET  200 010 010  4  8 1
W: Sabathia (6-3)
L: Bernero  (1-9)
S: Baez     (15)
-------------------------------------------------------
Readers Write In...
-------------------------------------------------------
Andy "Kin Korn" Karnitz

2 posts, 2 POTW? People are starting to talk!

Let me assure all- I HAVE NEVER HAD SEXUAL RELATIONS
WITH MATT O'TOOLE!

Just write it off to nepotism, folks, and take yer
lumps. Don't worry,
there's no way I go 3 for 3. Then again, there's no
way I ever made an
unassisted triple play- BUT I DID! Just ask my mom.

Enough tootin' my own horn. On to bigger fish. (insert
your own cliche here).

Chas left out a few biggies on his Cubs' list:

1) The Phils won the series.
2) The once pathetic Highlanders changed names and
stadiums, added a few neat players to the roster, and
won their 1st Series, and then kept winning them. The
Yanks
are now the standard by which all other champs in
N.American team sports are gauged.
3)Beloved Dodgers and Giants departed NYC for
perpetual sunshine(you screwed the pooch by going to
SF, Giants. Colder AND windier in both Seals and The
Stick).
4)Bob Hope celebrated b-days 9-100! Hell, he might
have still been in England in '08.
Know how Hope made his$$? Real-estate! Bought up the
San Fernando Valley cheap
in the '30s, started selling it off after WWII. That
guy kept those Holiday Specials on
NBC goin' with his own cash! The ratings weren't too
good for the last 20 years, so if he can cheat the
Nielsens for that long, I'm sure he can hold off death
for another century.
5)#42 breaks the color barrier.

which is as close to smooth transitioning i can do
to......

Jose "Jackass" Canseco claiming racial prejudice?!?!?

J.C., you were helping crucify yourself, even during
that great 4-5 year run you had. You
got caught speeding(with gun in car), beating your
wife, dating Madonna, brawling in bars
with brother Ozzie, etc., etc.

Did Jose have the original "Bad pub is better than no
pub" idea? Don't throw out the race card thing, here,
pal! 4-5 more years like the ones you had woulda put
you in The Hall,
and you coulda still killed a guy! Just ask Ty Cobb!

I kinda get where Pedro's comin' from- I'm sure he
here's quite a few ugly things coming from the stands
at Fenway when he ain't findin' them corners. And I'm
sure he reads the sometimes critical Gammons in The
Globe. But tryin' to link the two is kinda pathetic.

and now to the ugly....

Sunday's game against the Giants was, well..........,
we've all seen this kinda game before. I flipped to
ESPN Classic while they were bringin' German in, and I
knew better
to flip back. Surprises me, though, that this was the
first time all season I've done this.
The last couple years I did this in early April.

Love that new park in S.F. Pretty tough on power
hitters- You know you've seen an honest-to-god swat
when you've seen one there, whether a monster, like
Dmitri's on Friday, or just a squeaker over in left or
right. Park's got character, even if it's a contrived
sort of character. Fenway, Wrigley, Tiger, Polo
Grounds, Shibe, Forbes- maybe some of their  character
is/was flawed, but every scar has a great story! Give
me the old parks any old day. And while I'm near the
subject, I'll take Cohn, you can keep Kate Moss.

adios- andy

oh yeah, (i always forget something)- Matt, you know
you've always been my favorite 'cuz. Honest! Don't
believe your bro OR the Ryznar boys OR anyone named
Klozik. I DID NOT HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH THEM,
EITHER..... I mean, no , i never, ever told them they
were my fave cuz. Not a one of 'em!
-------------------------------------------------------
Steve "Stone" Sprague

I gotta say that I don't think Canseco's and
Martinez's accusations have any merit.  I think the
media covered the corked bat scandal so intensely
is because of Sosa's popularity.  He is the most
marketable player in the game.  He's Barry Bonds
without the chip on the shoulder.  Also a lot of the
coverage on ESPN's "Say it ain't Sosa" attempted to
put a more positive spin on things.  Joe Morgan
admitted that he also accidentally used a corked
bat in a game; they interviewed people to show that
the increased bat speed is almost completely offset by
the decrease in momentum due to the corking.

As for Peter Gammons I don't think his "pushing" for
Zito to win the Cy Young was racially motivated.  I
believe that he was just presenting the facts.  I
don't think that the outcome is swayed by one
broadcaster's comments.

Finally, I must defend my statement that gambling is
the number one reason that sports have fans.  My point
is that it is the biggest reason.  People like the
Tigers because their parents and grandparents spent
their whole lives rooting for them.  However, the only
reason anyone else knows anything about them is
because they have guys in their fantasy league playing

for or against the Tigers.  Or they dropped a dime on
Clemens getting his three hundredth win against them.
Again, my point was that gambling is the reason
sports have fans, not the reason teams have fans.
With the way teams switch cities lately I have to say
it's a damn good thing gambling is around to
keep interest up for the casual fan.

Let Pete in, baseball lost its integrity in 1919.

Stephen C. Sprague
-------------------------------------------------------
Aaron "Urlacher" Pelttari

Well, I haven't written in for a while, but I have to
respond after all the hating against the Cubs. I
admit, as Chas pointed out, that it's been a while
since they've won it all. These things happen. They
now have one of the best young pitching staffs in
baseball, though, and they could be good for awhile,
and if not, they're still my favorite team. As to
Sosa, the Cubs will live without him for seven games.
I think that I believe his story about the cork,
because he is the only player I know who actually
would use a corked bat during batting practice just to

show off to the fans. The guy loves attention. But he
handles it well and he plays hard.
-------------------------------------------------------
Nick "Cuyahoga" Ciofani

Enough with the Cubs, I almost hope they win the World
Series just to shut everyone up.  Then what would the
Cubs fan do, they'd probably just complain and
complain, because they only want the attention and
sympathy of sports fans.  Only fans from Cleveland can
complain, we haven't won a single sports championship
since 1964, Chicago had Jordan, Boston had Bird and
Tom Brady, Detroit had the Red Wings.  Cleveland has
had................................my point exactly. 
-------------------------------------------------------
Dan "Plesac" Kemp     ***POTW***

The whole "racist conspiracy of Major League Baseball"
is a crock.  Sosa cheated, it was obivous that he
cheated.  MLB examined his other bats to determine
whether or not his other bats were corked.  They took
a fair approach to the situation.  Cheaters have to be
punished, I don't care if their skin color is indigo,
black or white.  I saw the whole Canseco interview and
it was such a load of bull.  I lost all respect for
Canseco after that interview.  He literally said "why
is the media concentrating on the corked bat?  We
should instead concentrate on the good Sosa has done."
 Well I hate to break it to you Jose, but if he did
all these "great things" while cheating, these "great
things" don't have any credibility anymore. 

One last thing, the media attention isn't racially
influenced.  Mark McGwire took androstein (sp?) and
was ripped by the media for a whole season because of
it.  It wasn't even illegal, just questionable.
Unless he bleached his skin, I think Mark falls in the
"Caucasian-American" category.  Nuff said.

Dan "I'm now homeless and sleeping on an airmatress"
Kemp
-------------------------------------------------------
Toolie's Trashtalk...

First off, thanks again to Weiland for enduring a
baseball game Friday night.  It was a good time, but
the game was for the most part a bust.  I came to
realize, however, that winning is really just a bonus.
 It's kind of like going to the casino.  I go to enjoy
myself and concede that I'm going to lose X amount of
dollars.  However, I am ok with this, and I don't
spend more than I want to.  If I win, then it's a
great bonus and the fun is multiplied.  If I don't win
then I will still have fun and have a good story or
two to bring home. 

The Astros had six pitchers combine to throw a no
hitter in New York against the Yankees this week.
That wasn't the most part of the evening to me.  To
me, it was that there were bottles of champagne
waiting for those pitchers in their lockers after the
game.  Love Steinbrenner or hate him, he's pretty
classy and he loves his baseball team.  He plays by
the rules that are in place and deserves every win
that his team gets, though it pains me to type that.
After getting no hit, though, you can bet that the
fuse has gotten a lot shorter.  The Yanks dropped
deadbeat Juan Acevedo after he blew a chance for
Clemens' 300th at Wrigley.  So long Juan.  You'll
probably be back in Detroit soon.  As a side note,
Clemens fianlly got his 300th against the Cardinals. 

Speaking of Tiger's bullpen pitchers, here's my
analysis of the staff.

Sparks:  Dependable and can eat up innings.  If a game
goes late into extras, you can throw Sparks out there
for many innings and not have to use a starter.
Solid. 

Ledezma:  So far, all this guy does is blow leads.
All the buzz from the booth, however, suggests that he
will someday be awesome.  Yeah, him and Karim Garcia.

Roney:  I like this guy.  He gets the job done, and
some day I will reference him as Matt "What it's like
having a" Roney.  Oops, too late. 

Spurling:  Despite the HR given up, Spurling keeps his
name, The Turnicate, partially since I don't want to
waste it.  Stop the bleeding, Chris...please!

German:  I hate this guy now, but if he gets his
control down he will dominate like I would dominate
Dave Grillo in "Name that Tune." 

Walker:  I used to think this guy had "Home Run"
tatooed on his left arm.  But after some early year
shakiness, Walker has been pretty effective against
lefties. 

Avery:  Errr, he's been spotty at best.  If nothing
else, he's another left handed arm in the pen besides
Walker.  Necessary, but not too vital in the long run.


Anderson:  GET HEALTHY AND SAVE SOME GAMES.


The Cincinnati Reds won in their last at bat tonight,
prompting another one of their tired-act let's all
jump up and down together after we win routine.  Maybe
it's just win envy on my part, but it's already old.
Now I'm not against celebration, but come up with
somethng else please.  I feel like they're trying to
be that team that shows their heart so everyone starts
rooting for them.  I generally pull for the Reds, but
for some reason this bugs me a bit. 

But I haven't been watching nearly as much late night
ESPN as much lately.  Baseball Tonight has been
unimpressive, and I've been seeing some great flicks
on late night AMC.  Jaws, American Graffiti, and
Platoon.  Good stuff.  Also, I've been doing some
reading at night as well.  Right now I'm on Antigone.
I never really read the stuff when I was taking the
classes, so I'm making up for lost time and tuition. 

I have to say that I'm none too thrilled with the
sponsor of Tigers baseball on the radio in Lansing.
Hillsdale people may be familiar with that little
oasis off of I-69 at exit 16 (Jonesville Rd.), just
north of Coldwater.  Tigers Baseball is sponsored by
the Lion's Den, an adult "Superstore."  Now if I had a
kid who listened to baseball, I wouldn't want to have
to explain what the Lions Den was.  Come on, this is
baseball, not the XFL.  The station (92.7 the Ticket)
needs to find a new sponsor. 

Kemp, I am suprised that you had respect for Canseco
before he said that.  Hadn't he made enough of a fool
of himself?  Ciofani, the Indians had that World
Series back in 1997 they won.  Well, I never watched
the end of game 7, but they were winning going into
the bottom of the 9th, I figure they must have pulled
it out.  Nice to hear from Peltarri.  Sosa comes back
soon.  I wonder if Steinbrenner sends hm some
champagne?  =-) 

It's really late.  Time for some hard core log sawing.

Just recite the alphabet backwards...
Z
Y
X...
W.............................
I'm out.

Toolie
------------------------------------------------------
Tigers Weekly is in no way affiliated with the Detroit
Tigers or Major League Baseball. 

Hey you!  You are recieving this because I or someone
else thinks that you give a darn about baseball.  If
you don't, or just don't want to receive the Weekly
anymore, write back and put NO! in the subject box.
If you know anyone that would like to recieve TW,
reply and give me their names and e-mail addresses.
Play Ball!

If your e-mail address is changing, drop me a line and
I will update it....